5 Steps To Help You Find Your “Why”

Your WHY is simply = getting to know yourself better.

In order to become successful in life, you must get to know your habits, desires, motivations and strengths REALLY WELL. You must be aligned with and within yourself.

You don’t need to know the answer to every single one of the questions I have listed for you below in order to live a purposeful life, but if you CAN answer them fully and with ABSOLUTE CLARITY, you’ll get to where you want to go faster.

However, for most of us, it’s going to be a long process.

5 Steps To Help You Find Your "Why" written by Elaine Rau founder of LadyBossBlogger.com

I couldn’t answer any of the questions below when I started my blog. I was jobless, nearly broke, borderline depressed with zero self confidence and believed I had “no skills”.

But as I started to learn how to blog, I started learning how capable I was. Though I struggled with learning everything on my own from blogs here and there, I started to learn more about myself, and the best part was… I started to dream again. When I did, my confidence and self worth grew because I had rekindled HOPE.

Take time to do this exercise and really dig deep into WHO YOU ARE AT YOUR CORE (steps 1-4) + WHO YOU WANT TO BE (step 5)!



  1. What do you currently do for work?
  2. Why do you do it?
  3. What aspects do you enjoy?
  4. What aspects do you not enjoy?
  5. What kind of working environment do you thrive in?
  6. What kind of working environment do you die in?
  7. What do you do really really well?
  8. What are your strengths?
  9. What stresses you out?
  10. List a few times when you were happiest at work. What were you doing?



  1. What do you do outside of work for fun? To destress? To relax?
  2. What are your interests?
  3. What do you crave to spend time doing?
  4. What cause or issue touches your heart every time you hear about it?
  5. What came particularly easy for you as a child?
  6. What comes easily to you now?
  7. When you were a kid, what did you say you wanted to be when you grew up?
  8. Think of times when someone has been genuinely helped by something you’ve done. What did you do?
  9. What makes you feel good about yourself?
  10. What activity makes you loose track of time?



  1. When was the last time you hit the gym?
  2. How are your eating habits?
  3. Are you drinking enough water throughout the day?
  4. What is your body telling you?
  5. What’s out of balance in your life?



  1. What excites you in the world? List 2 or 3 things.
  2. What angers you in the world? List 2 or 3 things.
  3. How is what you’re doing making you a better person?
  4. How is what you’re doing making the world a better place?
  5. Do you believe in a higher power?



  1. Given your answers from above, what 3-5 beliefs are you most passionate about?
  2. Does your current work embody those beliefs? If yes, describe how your work allows you to live your why. If no, how can you connect your beliefs to your current work?
  3. If your current work makes it impossible to live your why, then list 3-5 possible dreams or businesses that would firmly embody your core beliefs.

Now, we are going to dive EVEN DEEPER and break down your WHY into two parts: passion + purpose.

Too often we neglect to differentiate the terms passion and purpose.

  • Passion is about your emotions and is what fuels your dreams.
  • Purpose is the reason behind why you do what you do.

Your purpose is the foundation on which your passion should be built.

  • Passion can often be about selfish motives.
  • Purpose has significant focus.

Passion can come and go, but purpose is forever (or at least, until you’ve completed your purpose and found another one).

  • Passion is about WHAT.
  • Purpose is about WHY.

While passions can help shape and form your personality, your purpose will help shape and form your identity. Both are equally important.

Back in January 2018, I was on a call with a successful businessman and I was telling him all my passionate ideas about how I wanted to help ladies learn how to blog so they could become financially free and his response was, “Ok, how is that impacting the world?”

At first I was kinda taken aback and thought, “Am I not being helpful to the ladies I want to serve who live in all parts of the world?” But his question opened my eyes up to the bigger picture. I do what I do because I want to make a better life for my husband’s family who live in poverty in Honduras.

I want his nieces and nephews to grow up with the same opportunities that I had. And although we currently support them, the world is bigger than family.

I want to be able to help as many kids as possible from Honduras live a better life. My husband was once one of those kids but because of the support from The Micah Project, a home for street boys in Honduras, he had the opportunity to work for more opportunities.

That day I got off the phone, I decided to dedicate my blog to The Micah Project and have been sending monthly donations ever since. I didn’t think it was within the budget to give, but when is it ever ‘in the budget’ to give?

“Those who are happiest are those who do the most for others.” — Booker T. Washington


It can be a small part of the world, but it’s beyond yourself and your own family. You don’t have to know the answer yet, but I urge you to actively seek it out.